EL BLOG ILUSORIO DE RUDY: Loosen the Hamstrings of Your Gullibility

15.1.11

Loosen the Hamstrings of Your Gullibility

The following image may strain your credulousness, so please stretch it out before reading further.

Finished? Then I say to you that this foto is transmitted unto you by a most respectable correspondent; that is, a correspondent who is far from credulous himself, and who has no interest in deceiving others, to wit:

Myself!

That said, behold the the fate of a backboarding that foolishly stood in my path during a match for team España!

It is my most fervent desire to replicate this accomplishment in tonight’s match against the Nets of New Jersey.

And if THIS individual is residing beneath the shards of falling plexiglass . . . ah, life would be sweet, ¿no?

Foto via.

3 comments:

LAJanuary 15, 2011 at 4:58 PM
oh my gosh thats so funny!!!!
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itsnotcomcasticJanuary 16, 2011 at 8:35 AM
Rudy, did you change your numero to 66 for that game? You would then be known as senor Rafael Araujo.

We will not be fooled by your deceivings!
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AnonymousJanuary 16, 2011 at 1:16 PM
Rudy.. I loved the "accidental" elbow that Sasha received last night when free throws were being shot... what a baby!
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"El Blog Ilusorio": In the Orbs of Others!

Rudy's Hypothetical Rules of Basketball

1. In ten years, nobody will remember the details of score, assists, or rebounds. They will only remember who won them a chalupa.

2. Any shot worth shooting is worth shooting twice.

3. When not shooting on offense, you should be communicating, passing, and running. Also, yell “Foul!” repeatedly. Why? How can officials summon help if you yell “Good D!” or “Our opponents are superior!”?

4. If legitimately called for a foul, say, “A good call!” (Do this no more than once a game.)

5. When in possession of the ball, have a plan. Further, have a back-up plan, because the first plan won't work (unless you are Brandon Roy).

6. Use cover or concealment as much as possible. (Both Oden and Pryzbilla provide these in abundance.)

7. On defense, ignore words and direct your eyesight to the ball. (Opposing Cleveland, LeBron James told me he would pull up for a jumper. I advanced upon him. Then James drove baseline with great speed. Both of my ankles gave way!)

8. The faster you begin an opponent’s blow-out, the more shots everyone will get.

9. Be polite and professional to everyone you play against. Then destroy them, for they wish to defeat you.

10. Practice shooting in a dimly-lit practice area with someone shouting unflattering threats at you. (I found this useful in Europe, where partial power outages were not uncommon.)

11. You may feel sad about snapping another team’s back with a clinch alley-oop or a clutching 3-pointer. But sadness is preferred to losing. And the winning will then bring happiness. (In the case of defeating the Lakers, the happiness will be most pronounced.)

12. Purple is not my color. (It may not be anyone’s color.)