EL BLOG ILUSORIO DE RUDY: On Ostracism

9.5.10

On Ostracism

The question is floated: Shall I make return to the Portland Trail Blazers next annum? There are many views among the learned scribes, but for the best analysis of sport, we must visit the democracy of ancient Athens! For it was there that the system of ostracism had beginnings.

Imagine the Athenians had to decide between two politicians for an office. If the citizens wished it so, the election could be an “ostracism” —that is, after the vote, one politician was chosen for office, while the other was exiled from the city!

To be accomplishing this, the Athenians scratched the name of the politician they wanted to be rid of on a piece of pottery called an “ostrakon.” If more than 6000 citizens cast ostrakons for a candidate, he went into “honorable exile” from Athens for a decade. (Of course, given what is happening in Athens today, an ostracism might be a welcome fate!)

It is no secret that Brandon Roy plays in front of me. And it is known that I am not Brandon Roy. If there were a vote for ostracism, I have no doubt I would be sent packaging. But there is also a third party at shooting guard, Martell Webster…so is our water hopelessly muddied?

The answer can be found in Grecian pasts! In 415 BCE, an excellent Athenian politician named Hyperbolus entered an ostracism match with TWO candidates, namely Alcibiades and Nicias. But though Hyperbolus was in a superior position, Alcibiades and Nicias pooled their political fortunes. In doing so, they managed to exile Hyperbolus!

I mention this as a veiled offer to Martell Webster: Together, there is MUCH we can accomplish, mi amigo!

Fotos from the Oregonian.

1 comment:

AnonymousMay 11, 2010 at 12:15 PM
Rudy - I know the decision to return may not be 100% in your hands, however there are a ton of fans in Ptown that would love to have you return for your 3rd year of your rookie contract. This is your chance to prove the naysayers wrong and come back stronger and more committed than ever. I truly hope that you decide from your end to return, to train hard this summer, and come back fired up and ready to make a run in the playoff's. Injury's can tweak with you, so I'm looking for a 100% Rudy next year that's draining 3's, dishing dime's and snagging balls from the defender. Stay positive me amigo.
Faithful Blazer Fan
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"El Blog Ilusorio": In the Orbs of Others!

Rudy's Hypothetical Rules of Basketball

1. In ten years, nobody will remember the details of score, assists, or rebounds. They will only remember who won them a chalupa.

2. Any shot worth shooting is worth shooting twice.

3. When not shooting on offense, you should be communicating, passing, and running. Also, yell “Foul!” repeatedly. Why? How can officials summon help if you yell “Good D!” or “Our opponents are superior!”?

4. If legitimately called for a foul, say, “A good call!” (Do this no more than once a game.)

5. When in possession of the ball, have a plan. Further, have a back-up plan, because the first plan won't work (unless you are Brandon Roy).

6. Use cover or concealment as much as possible. (Both Oden and Pryzbilla provide these in abundance.)

7. On defense, ignore words and direct your eyesight to the ball. (Opposing Cleveland, LeBron James told me he would pull up for a jumper. I advanced upon him. Then James drove baseline with great speed. Both of my ankles gave way!)

8. The faster you begin an opponent’s blow-out, the more shots everyone will get.

9. Be polite and professional to everyone you play against. Then destroy them, for they wish to defeat you.

10. Practice shooting in a dimly-lit practice area with someone shouting unflattering threats at you. (I found this useful in Europe, where partial power outages were not uncommon.)

11. You may feel sad about snapping another team’s back with a clinch alley-oop or a clutching 3-pointer. But sadness is preferred to losing. And the winning will then bring happiness. (In the case of defeating the Lakers, the happiness will be most pronounced.)

12. Purple is not my color. (It may not be anyone’s color.)