Yao Ming Will Never Stop the Golden Puck

“¡Gol! I win again!”

Fernando Alonso's shouting at the end of our air-hockey match is most bothersome. First, it costs me another of the prized Krugerrand pucks. To further my annoyance, the short-legged race-car driver seems to be faster at air-hockeying than me!

But how can this be? I am a professional athlete who has learned to utilize every sinew in his coiled steel frame. Fernando is a race-car driver. That means he steps on the petrol while grasping a steering wheel. (This is not to belittle what he does. It is just that what he does is not much.)

Nonetheless, I pay the puck.

Seeking insights into why this miniature wheel jockey has an air-hockey edging on me led me to a discovery. New evidence from neuroscientist David Eagleman suggests that tall people live further in the past than short people. Of course!

As is known, all people (even the French!) experience reality by the feedback that their senses provide. But for a tall person, these sensations take longer to travel to the brain.

Imagine the following: In a match against the Trail Blazers, Shaquille O’Neal falls to the floor. Joel Pryzbilla is nearby, and he accidentally kicks the fallen man in his kidneys. Because Joel is seven-feet tall, it would take a tenth of a second longer for the sensation of kicking to travel from his toes, and up his ankle, leg, and backbone before arriving at his brain.

Joel could then consider the tempting notion of whether he wanted to do it again!

And as a tall person has a constant short delay on his body’s information relative to a pequeño like Fernando, it means I am always a nanosecond late trying to block that golden puck!

(To pay my puckish debts, I have been motivated to advertise for fine products and services; por ejemplo, yesterday I shot a number of ads for Bidobido.com. Visit them today!)

Rudy y Fernando from Rudyfans.