A difficult week. My poor play in the playoffings has resulted in attempted character assassinations here, here, and here. And here...and even my post-practice heaves are subject to barbs! This has resulted in something most unwelcome— yes, a decrease in “Ru-dy” chants, but more importantly, a decline in blog visitations!
Matters grew so dire, I utilized technologies to locate my sole remaining reader. Whoever this individual was, he or she visited my site daily and diligently. Such loyalty! So I decided to pay a visit! Sitemeters and Google mappings provided the needed coordinates.
Ascending the walkway to an attractive cottage in Lake Oswego, I imagined who my sole remaining supporter might be. Perhaps a comely Oregonian answering the portal in a Rudy jersey? Perhaps not, but no matter! The encounter would doubtless leave my reinvigorated for our next match!
Instead, I got one of the region’s ubiquitous doughy, bald fellows.
“So you are the one who has been reading!” I said undeterred. “I thank you for the support.”
“My bloggings!” I prompted with a knowing smile.
“Ah!” the man shook his head in demurral. “No, I’m a Nuggets fan. My wife set our browser’s homepage to your blog to tease me.”
Further words were exchanged. I do not recall them.
Retreating to my auto, I felt two centimeters shorter. If only I could avert my eyes from my own situation! I was thus reminded of the travails of the Earl of Uxbridge at Waterloo. After his ninth steed was shot from under him, the Earl’s luck changed...for the worse! A load of grapeshot smashed into his right knee and the Earl cried out, “By God, sir, I've lost my leg!”
His companion removed a telescope from his eye and said, “By God, sir, so you have.”
Fotos from Getty Images and Tara Jane.