Distant Dreams and the Brains of Pharaohs

As I commenced to address this season, I looked back upon our 2008-2009 campaign with condescension. To be sure, Sergio and I had a fine year, but I considered it a mere preparation for NOW.

And here I am months later, a mere afterglow of myself! It is sweet mercy granted by Providencia that I was ignorant of my future. My defense is so bad, my countryman from the Toronto Raptors has volunteered his name to me, so that I might be called Jose Calderowned.

And my offense! It is to weep tears of blood.

Imagine if we knew the outcomes of all our de tres puntos attempts and elaborate parquet schemes…how ruined our lives would be! 

Instead we trot up and down the basketball court of life unaware of life outside the pavilion, as happy as any dumb animal...that also happens to play basketball.

What is next? Who knows it? If we were to possess a herald of the future on the team, it would have to be Andre Miller. While he may not be an oracle, I am told that in his youth, Andre performed antic routines. Perhaps!

Yet I think of him as an rough uncle, complete with irascible habits, unstoppable reminiscences, and a form from the three-point line that causes shooting coaches to quail and avert their eyes.

Here is Andre’s high-pitched post-match comment after this evening’s drubbing in Phoenix: “Rudy, do you know how the ancient Egyptians prepared the Pharaoh’s body for the afterlife?

I replied that I was unaware of their methods.

They pulled the Pharaoh’s brain out of his skull through his nose with a hook. And that ain’t nothin’ compared to what the Suns just did to us out there tonight!
Matador foto from Reuters
Rudy graphic by Brandon Mitchell.

1 comment:

  1. Pulled his brain out of his skull! Oh my Ra' haha, love your answer!, hopefully my Egyptology teacher won't read this comment lol.



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