EL BLOG ILUSORIO DE RUDY: Full Court Press Conference

20.1.09

Full Court Press Conference

The reporters came to me for a conference. This is a full court press conference, yes? The picture will take you to the linkage. One question that was asked was whether I am more of a dunker or three-point shooter. This is a good thought. Perhaps if I am lucky again next year, I can do both contests at the All Star Weekend.

Another thing that has been asked is whether I have been slam dunking in competitions before. The answer is yes. Four years ago, I was in a European dunking contest. I came in second. (Michael Gelabale took the first place.)

In this article, I share how I will create a good slam, while not serving specifics. And my sorrows to Joe Alexander, who is planning his own private dunk contest at his home. It is invitation only. And only he is invited.

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"El Blog Ilusorio": In the Orbs of Others!

Rudy's Hypothetical Rules of Basketball

1. In ten years, nobody will remember the details of score, assists, or rebounds. They will only remember who won them a chalupa.

2. Any shot worth shooting is worth shooting twice.

3. When not shooting on offense, you should be communicating, passing, and running. Also, yell “Foul!” repeatedly. Why? How can officials summon help if you yell “Good D!” or “Our opponents are superior!”?

4. If legitimately called for a foul, say, “A good call!” (Do this no more than once a game.)

5. When in possession of the ball, have a plan. Further, have a back-up plan, because the first plan won't work (unless you are Brandon Roy).

6. Use cover or concealment as much as possible. (Both Oden and Pryzbilla provide these in abundance.)

7. On defense, ignore words and direct your eyesight to the ball. (Opposing Cleveland, LeBron James told me he would pull up for a jumper. I advanced upon him. Then James drove baseline with great speed. Both of my ankles gave way!)

8. The faster you begin an opponent’s blow-out, the more shots everyone will get.

9. Be polite and professional to everyone you play against. Then destroy them, for they wish to defeat you.

10. Practice shooting in a dimly-lit practice area with someone shouting unflattering threats at you. (I found this useful in Europe, where partial power outages were not uncommon.)

11. You may feel sad about snapping another team’s back with a clinch alley-oop or a clutching 3-pointer. But sadness is preferred to losing. And the winning will then bring happiness. (In the case of defeating the Lakers, the happiness will be most pronounced.)

12. Purple is not my color. (It may not be anyone’s color.)