EL BLOG ILUSORIO DE RUDY: Tomorrow, We Dunk

13.2.09

Tomorrow, We Dunk

Be wishing me luck, for tomorrow, we dunk.

The hugeness of my challenge looms. I refer to the weather. I come from a warm climate, but there is no preparation for the diabolical heat of Phoenix.

Stepping from our plane, my mate Brandon Roy proclaimed, “Phoenix: It’s dehyd-rific!” Without Sergio here, I will rely on Brandon for quips of this nature. And without Sergio's passing, I shall need the assistance of a non-Blazer tomorrow. Although his touch with the ball is good, the Spaniard I refer to may not be as sympatico to my feeding needs as I would wish.

P.S. Sergio, I would not need his help if you were here. Have amusement while vacationing in San Francisco. ¡Tendrá que pagar!

Posdata final: Tonight, Greg Oden and myself will partake in our third game in as many days: The Rookie Challenge!

5 comments:

AnonymousFebruary 13, 2009 at 9:25 PM
Go get 'em Rudy!
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AnonymousFebruary 14, 2009 at 10:23 PM
"the Spaniard I refer to may not be as sympatico to my feeding needs as I would wish."

You were sooo right about that!!:)
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AnonymousFebruary 16, 2009 at 7:11 PM
Awesome dunks Rudy!!! You deserved WAY more points.
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AnonymousFebruary 22, 2009 at 2:23 PM
Rudy... you were robbed at the slam dunk contest...robbed I tell ya!!
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AnonymousFebruary 6, 2010 at 7:46 PM
Hola Rudy,

Me alegro que sientes esperanza hoy. A mi me gustan los climas mas calidos.

Te deseo lo mejor,
Laura
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"El Blog Ilusorio": In the Orbs of Others!

Rudy's Hypothetical Rules of Basketball

1. In ten years, nobody will remember the details of score, assists, or rebounds. They will only remember who won them a chalupa.

2. Any shot worth shooting is worth shooting twice.

3. When not shooting on offense, you should be communicating, passing, and running. Also, yell “Foul!” repeatedly. Why? How can officials summon help if you yell “Good D!” or “Our opponents are superior!”?

4. If legitimately called for a foul, say, “A good call!” (Do this no more than once a game.)

5. When in possession of the ball, have a plan. Further, have a back-up plan, because the first plan won't work (unless you are Brandon Roy).

6. Use cover or concealment as much as possible. (Both Oden and Pryzbilla provide these in abundance.)

7. On defense, ignore words and direct your eyesight to the ball. (Opposing Cleveland, LeBron James told me he would pull up for a jumper. I advanced upon him. Then James drove baseline with great speed. Both of my ankles gave way!)

8. The faster you begin an opponent’s blow-out, the more shots everyone will get.

9. Be polite and professional to everyone you play against. Then destroy them, for they wish to defeat you.

10. Practice shooting in a dimly-lit practice area with someone shouting unflattering threats at you. (I found this useful in Europe, where partial power outages were not uncommon.)

11. You may feel sad about snapping another team’s back with a clinch alley-oop or a clutching 3-pointer. But sadness is preferred to losing. And the winning will then bring happiness. (In the case of defeating the Lakers, the happiness will be most pronounced.)

12. Purple is not my color. (It may not be anyone’s color.)