19.3.09

Jeff Foster Has an Adamantine Exoskeleton

While dribbling in Indiana, my mate LaMarcus Aldridge struck his head against Jeff Foster’s chest. The impact did not seem substantial, thus I was surprised to see LaMarcus fall like a bull receiving its deathblow in the ring! My wonderment was inflated in the lockerroom when I learned LaMarcus had a concussion, and is doubtful for this evening's match against Cleveland.

Seeing my befuddlement, a grim Steve Blake gave me the intelligence: Jeff Foster has the steeliest thorax in the NBA. Travis Outlaw nodded in agreement, showing his upper gums covered in blood from a separate blow delivered by Foster. And Channing Frye chimed in, “Drive on that Pacer at your peril, Spaniard.” I will take to heart these words to the wise!

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