EL BLOG ILUSORIO DE RUDY: Once More, With the Feeling

16.3.09

Once More, With the Feeling

I have at least two Trail Blazer mates for whom English is a non-native tongue. Can our language difficulties hamper our on-court performance?

Perhaps. But I feel basketball is an international language, like amor or matemáticas. Two players make eye contact, and without a word, something passes between them.

Maybe it is a ball.

My throat infection is making exponents of the aches and pains I already possessed from the Ariza/Fernández Conflict. So I feel older than chronology suggests. It puts me in mind of 73-year-old Ken Mink. Señor Mink was a basketball player for Roane State College this season. And he also played in college 53 years ago! He was removed from the team after being accused of shooting creams of shaving into his coach’s office chamber.

Mink was terminated in 2009 as well. Shaving products played no role this time. Instead it was because of his failure to reach required academic standards in a course.

In which of Mink's classes was the flunking committed? ¡Español! So yes, language difficulties CAN put the cramp up a player’s court time. (More is the pitying.)

(Rudy photo from ACB. Ken Mink photo from Knox News.)

2 comments:

AnonymousMarch 17, 2009 at 12:49 AM
is this blog real or fake!?
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AnonymousMarch 17, 2009 at 7:01 AM
Yes!
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"El Blog Ilusorio": In the Orbs of Others!

Rudy's Hypothetical Rules of Basketball

1. In ten years, nobody will remember the details of score, assists, or rebounds. They will only remember who won them a chalupa.

2. Any shot worth shooting is worth shooting twice.

3. When not shooting on offense, you should be communicating, passing, and running. Also, yell “Foul!” repeatedly. Why? How can officials summon help if you yell “Good D!” or “Our opponents are superior!”?

4. If legitimately called for a foul, say, “A good call!” (Do this no more than once a game.)

5. When in possession of the ball, have a plan. Further, have a back-up plan, because the first plan won't work (unless you are Brandon Roy).

6. Use cover or concealment as much as possible. (Both Oden and Pryzbilla provide these in abundance.)

7. On defense, ignore words and direct your eyesight to the ball. (Opposing Cleveland, LeBron James told me he would pull up for a jumper. I advanced upon him. Then James drove baseline with great speed. Both of my ankles gave way!)

8. The faster you begin an opponent’s blow-out, the more shots everyone will get.

9. Be polite and professional to everyone you play against. Then destroy them, for they wish to defeat you.

10. Practice shooting in a dimly-lit practice area with someone shouting unflattering threats at you. (I found this useful in Europe, where partial power outages were not uncommon.)

11. You may feel sad about snapping another team’s back with a clinch alley-oop or a clutching 3-pointer. But sadness is preferred to losing. And the winning will then bring happiness. (In the case of defeating the Lakers, the happiness will be most pronounced.)

12. Purple is not my color. (It may not be anyone’s color.)